today was the the last day of the second last midsems of my engineering and contrary to the popular belief i am not at all happy. I am rather dissatisfied considering the fact that the beginning of Monday will start a new phase of placements procedure where there will b a usual rush of companies showing no interest of recruiting me!!
this week was so relaxed n calm where my only motive was to study but now back to serious stuff n securing future. i hv infact started realizing that how lucky i have been till now where there were no responsibilities on me and my only goal was to study
life will take a total u turn once i step out of the clg and face the real working culture
i hv realised tht these times r killing me and there r 2 alternatives for remedy:
either i step back in time and relive the face where i had to attend classes n pass examinations(in clg) or i get an opportunity to celebrate my lkast year in clg with a bang by getting placed soon...........

FRIENDSHIP.........as they might call it??

well 1 thing i realized today;

it does not hurts when u fail;
but it hurts when your friend succeeds

well the events of today made me feel so low that it took around 1 hour of depressing sad music and lots of bakwaas tv to bring me back to my normal senses
although i didnt have much hopes but still the announcement of results made me f eel terrible and broken.
sorry but couldnot help my feelings??
even this is not a thing to be disclosed on fb as it may be taken in a wrong sense by many( although it is wrong)

well the above incident surely adds one more feather in my already over critical and depressing personality and one thing is for sure that i cannot share happiness with others leave alone the sorrows!!
i am actually obssessed with myself and could not find away to help me out of this negative vibes.may my life is destined to be survive and conquer these negative traits and infact i have become so habitual to them that i cannot even imagine my life in a positive manner

helpless???????

well may times in life we feel it almost impossible to decide on certain things even if those things are not of that critical importance!!!
that's because we have to choose among alternatives n we may seldom feel not to leave any option behind
many of my friends are quite firm decision makers and rarely face this dilemma but the biggest tragedy of may life is that i am a very weak decision maker and even gets stuck in taking simple illogical decisions(eg. topic for writing here)
this problem extends to almost every sphere of my life ranging from career to future plans to my likes dislikes and even my mode of choosing friends!!!
most of the times i have to take the rescue by speaking lie just to keepall the options open n not sticking to a particular choice
but even this stratyegy doesnot help me always n i often feel that the decision taken by me at the virtue of circumstance goes mostly against me which further weakens my decision handling capacity
seriously i get irritated by my behaviour only but could not see any ray of change

p.s. if you couldnot understand the article thats may be because i didnt wanted u too just to keep my options open for future!!!!!!!1

over excitedness????????

well i am writing here after a very long time as i was feeling short of topics but my today's topic is also very stupid and illogical.............cant help it!
well i am very fond of watching tv and particularly reality shows but never developed any emotions towards it
but today watching DID finale n waiting for results for 4 hrs i found dat i am actually praying for one of the contestant to win. (although i never care to vote due to high charges)
n when she finally win i dont know but a sudden excitement caught me and i felt overjoyed and brilliant unnecessarily!
although the winner has no connection with me and is not giving me anything in return but i genuinely felt for her n i am unable to understand my feelings
may b i am simply overreacting or creating a hype but atleast it gave me inspiration to write after such a long time

its been enough on protest but still i cannot restrain myself from writing on it. especially when the situation is changing rapidly .I could see many of my friends detaching themselves from the protest bcoz they feel that it is not coming to any results..........
i am not feeling the same and is confused whether i am very much into the cause of protest or is just supporting it as an excuse not to attend the classes????????
i still want to attend dharnas but with none of my friends going to it i hardly feel i will go for it
i am not here to motivate anyone as it is useless but just waiting(although probability is too less) of something really big to happen

FRIENDSHIP?????

The male protagonist in 2 states(spicy story of Indian marriages) says

"i cant be friend with girls"

Well long ago i would have surely disagreed with krish but the changing times have shown me that krish is absolutely right.
Even i cant be just friends with the girls because something else develops in a relationship over the times and the probability of occurrence of "something else" increases specially when you are single(ready to mingle) and you are being associated with that "special friend" from a long time.
I am not sure whether that "something" has developed in my most precious friendship or this is just an impasse.
but all my friends(obviously girls) plz either dont let me remain single or dont be associated with me for a long time as "HISTORY ALWAYS REPEATS ITSELF"

"Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies."


Probably no man ever had a friend that he did not dislike a little

well The problem in my case is that i am very complaining and wants everything perfect therefore for me ; my friends are full of qualities that i dislike
so i till date i am confused about what true friendship is???????
well i think its impossible for me to change and therefore my friends have to make a move to change
my wait for a perfect friend continues and i hope not till eternity..........

mega protest

Thanks to all the lazy, selfish and careless dceiites that the mega protest of Friday at cp actually turned out as a flop show. People were busy relaxing themselves at home or enjoying ipl but found it unworthy to attend the protest even though it was hugely publicised and was alleged to be the last one.
People did not have the time to come out for it but were eager to know its outcome so they can have an idea whether they have to appear in mid sems from 29!!!!!!
shit man this is the limit.......
i really want to give kudos to all the 4 years who are actually leading us and are the sole carriers of the protest bcoz simply others dont give a damn about it but are concerned only with the results of it
lets wait and watch out for the ultimate battle.........

well as usual i am again having random thoughts as to feel rejuvenated about witnessing such a unity for boycott of mid sems or to feel gloomy that 12 days have passed on with protest and i could see no ray of hope (except the occasional hearings of resignation of "pappu".
My depressing views apart i couldn't forget the yesterday scene at Japanese park where the turnout was much higher than expected.
kudos to dceiites and their spirit to fight for their own identity
lets be united in these moments of endurance and patience.......